T O P S E C R E T
From: Buzz Lightyear Space Ranger Universe Protection Unit — Eastern Quadrant, Sector 12.
To: Star Command (Commander Turner Lightyear).
Once again I stowed away in the aliens’ space ship and we went on a journey down south (I’m not sure why we call their vehicles ‘space ships’ because they get no where near space). It was quite a trip up through the great mountains that are found in Sectors 12 & 16. My instruments indicated we were at almost 4,000 feet above sea level at one point. The air was a tad thinner than normal, but still quite breathable. The aliens space ship is quite slow. My instruments indicated that we topped out at 14 hectares per sniffle, which translates to 72 m.p.h. local speed.
After stopping at a supply store named after Joe, we headed into what the aliens called a “trendy” area for some fine dining.
I found that the best way to get around is to blend in and act natural. Here I’m demonstrating this technique on a platform the aliens use to wait for city-bound transportation. Nobody noticed me at all, even when the city-bound unit came by.
On the look out, while the aliens feasted inside. It’s ok, I have plenty of rations.
The male alien ate what is called a Reuben, but I don’t think that Reuben is inside the meal. Perhaps Reuben invented it. The female had corned beef hash, which I thought was illegal. But there didn’t seem to be any law enforcement around other than myself. Since I’m not clear on the law concerning hash, no arrests were made.
The success of the mission, as you said before my departure, is to remain completely unknown to the aliens we are watching. So far, they have no awareness of my presence. This, I attribute, to my excellent skills in moving about quietly and with lots of camouflage. I know you must be proud and knew I would succeed. I am the best Space Ranger for Star Command.
All photos are copyright © Timothy J. Hammons 2021.